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The Dating Pool

I have done a completely unscientific poll among my friends about responses to dating a blind woman. Most of my “first dates” in this new life have been set up through friends. This allows me a certain degree of comfort - if a friend recommends I meet someone, I am reasonably safe assuming that person is is not an escaped felon, a paranoid schizophrenic, a 75 year old masquerading as a 50 year old, a habitual drug user or a full body art enthusiast. I do not discriminate against any person who may chose or may be chosen to live with any of those lifestyles. It is simply not my livestyle. That being said, if a friend recommends I see someone, I will probably make arrangements to meet that person. My friends know me and know who I am and I trust them

Here is the interesting part of the story. It seems that about one third of the men my friends think may be a good match, do not think they could date a blind woman. Fair enough - I give these men credit for being able to articulate what they will and will not be open to. At the same time, I say a little prayer of thanks for taking these narrow minded princesses out of my dating pool.

That leaves us with about two thirds. This group can be further divided. There are those who are willing to contemplate dating a blind woman. Hmmmm.....these men are willing to think about whether or not they want to date a blind woman. They have not even met me, a mutual friend has suggested they may want to meet me, but they are not sure they want to meet a blind woman. Again, a little prayer of thanks as I remove these men from my dating pool.

Fortunately there are men who believe the person is important. My vision loss does not define me, it is a part of who I am. I am Cindy and Cindy happens to be blind, Cindy happens to have white hair, and Cindy happens to have a great sense of humour. Some men get this. Again, a little prayer of thanks that these people do exist. These are the men with whom I may choose to have a first date.

Disclaimer:

The thoughts and opinions expressed in the Blind Canadians Blog are those of the contributing authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the AEBC, its members, or any of its donors and fundraising partners.

Comments

good for you cindy. When I went back to dating, I did not have friends that recommended anyone so I was left to go it alone. Well I used a dating service and when I started talking to them, I would let them know that I was blind but was living by myself and very independent. I only had about 4 dates and then I met the man I am with now. he told and still tells anyone knew in our life that he wanted a unique girlfriend and got one.
good luck in the dating field. I hope you find someone who is willing to share their life with you.