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What am I afraid of

I correspond regularly with a very good friend. We ask and answer questions that require thought, insight and self-examination. This week’s question was “what are you afraid of”.

I am afraid of ferris wheels. I can do roller coasters and rides that travel in circles, but ferris wheels scare me. I am also afraid of clowns. There is something about the painted face and the paradox of silly hair with a sad smile that scares me. I am also afraid that I will be a lonely old woman - hence this whole dating thing. And dating, at 55, after a 32 year marriage is frightening. Dating is different now then when I was a teenager. As a teen, I had my whole life ahead of me, I wore rose coloured glasses and I thought I could do anything I wanted. I met people at school, at work, at the arena, where I volunteered, and all of my peers were single. Now, most of my peers are married and as a retired woman, I don’t go to work. As a blind, single woman, I don’t attend many events and activities outside of walking or cab distance. These parameters severely limit one’s ability to meet new people. Fortunately I have a great circle of friends and family that include me in their activities and introduce me to new friends. But, dating at 55 is frightening and not dating at 55 is frightening. Either way I need to “suck it up buttercup” and jump in.

I did just that this weekend. I was out for dinner with two couples on Friday night at our local pub. We are attending a charity fund raiser in the spring and they are conspiring to find me a date. They also invited themselves and a couple of other friends to my house for Super Bowl. Super Bowl - is that football or hockey? Doesn’t matter, sporting events require meat, so pulled pork and spicy coleslaw on kaisers, humus, bruschetta and olive tapenade on crostini, tortilla chips with salsa and pepperettes! New friends, new activities and new experiences. Life is good. Yes, a little frightening, but good.

Disclaimer:

This blog is curated by the AEBC, but welcomes contributions from members and non-members alike. The thoughts, views, and opinions expressed in the Blind Canadians Blog are those of the contributing authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the AEBC, its members, or any of its donors and partners.
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